The Simple Life: The Story of the Shared Fork

January 9, 2009 by Chelsea
Filed under Frugality

3181612041_955cdfde48_m The Simple Life: The Story of the Shared Fork When Tim and I were engaged we were invited over with a group of fellow college students to our local church leader’s home. When we drove into their neighborhood and saw the beautiful landscaping and large homes we knew this family did very well for themselves. They were in the prime of their lives, with three or four children still at home.

Towards the end of the evening we were able to talk to our leader and his wife and they shared some stories of when they were young and first married. The story that has stuck with me is the story of the shared fork.

During the first year of their marriage they were in school and had very little income. In fact times were so lean that they had only one fork in their household which they took turns eating from. They did this for nine months until they had the extra money (about a dime) to buy a fork. They were so determined to live within their means that they made the necessary sacrifices to achieve their goals.

As I heard them speak of their humble beginning in the walls of their beautiful home I knew they had learned the lessons of frugality to achieve financial goals over time. The greater lesson I learned was that this family looked back with fondness at the times when they relied on each other and used creativity and humor to make it through each month. Tim and I both received the feeling that although they were grateful for the security they now enjoyed, they would return back to those lean times in a heartbeat because of the simplicity and closeness those times brought.

This family learned how to be the master of their money, however little or great that was, in both action and attitude. This simple lesson has stayed with Tim and I through the early years of our marriage, as we remember that most successful people started where we did, in a little apartment just scraping by.

Tim and I have a similar story from the first month of our marriage. We were living in Utah, having just been married around Thanksgiving, and moved into Tim’s uncle’s basement. I was going to school and Tim was working until we would both go back to school in Idaho that January. Our wedding receptions were scheduled after Christmas when we had a break from school. So during this month we had very little household items, and little desire to use our meager income to purchase items until we knew what gifts we would receive at our receptions.

Somehow we ended up with only one plate between us. Remembering the story of the shared fork we resolved that we could live off of one plate until our wedding receptions. We did this for a few weeks, until one day I decided that we really could spare $1 for a plate and bought one at the dollar store. Tim was disappointed that I didn’t last the month, and looking back I am a little disappointed too.

Even though our experiment was prematurely ended the lesson of simplicity and frugality has stuck with us. There have been times in our marriage when we slept on an air mattress as a bed, didn’t have a microwave, and walked everywhere to save gas money. However lean the times though we never bought stuff on credit and we always made saving and staying out of consumer debt a priority.

Now I don’t know if we’ll ever live a house as nice as our church leader’s, and I don’t want to set my heart on that goal and lose focus on the most important things in life. But I do know that when we control our money in action and attitudes, our lives are simpler and our peace increases.